Unmitigated

Loopholes

Classroom conversation about DNA, chromosomes, and genetics was in full force. We were running a little short on time, and the children like to share what I call "One time..." stories. You know. The ones where every phrase ends in a question mark?

"One time? When my cousin was over? We were watching the Discovery Channel? And we saw this guy?..." And on, and on.

Anyway, time was tight, so when Zak raised his hand, and started to share a One Time Story, "There was this woman? Who had..."

"Wait, Zak. Is this a story or a question? I can only do questions right now."

So he thought for a minute and said, "Did you know that one time? There was this woman?..."

I had to high five him. And yes, he got to tell his story, because he found the loophole.

Nothing Says Love Like an Undead Chicken

Look what I got from Forever A Jersey Girl!

I don't know who named it, but they are my newest hero!

"The blogger who receives this award believes in the Tao of the zombie chicken - excellence, grace and persistence in all situations, even in the midst of a zombie apocalypse. These amazing bloggers regularly produce content so remarkable that their readers would brave a raving pack of zombie chickens just to be able to read their inspiring words. As a recipient of this world-renowned award, you now have the task of passing it on to at least 5 other worthy bloggers. Do not risk the wrath of the zombie chickens by choosing unwisely or not choosing at all..."

There are several blogs whose name pops up in my reader, and makes my cold, little heart go pitter-pat.

1. Captain Dumbass at Us and Them
2. MamaDawg at TwoDogsRunning
3. Chrisy at CSquaredPlus3 (even though she won't know how to post the award on her blog!)
4. LiteralDan at, well, LiteralDan
5. Suzanne at TwentyFouratHeart
5. And for his very first blog award, my loving, talented Husband, JimStyro at SpeakinginCAPS.

Yes, I picked six. The extra '5' was to keep LiteralDan's obssessive/compulsive head from exploding. Now, off with you, before I set my chickens on you.

Random Thoughts*

My first entry for....

*The basement is still smelling very musty, and Handy Jeff is going to come see what he can do if it's not much improved by tomorrow. Husband inquired as to what the plumber said was plugging the drain. I refused to answer on the the grounds that I might incriminate myself. Just let me say that I don't think it's fair that someone should have to live through hot flashes and a period at the same damn time.

*It was 85 degrees and gorgeously sunny yesterday. Today, it was rainy and 45 degrees. I didn't care. My toes have been freed and they aren't going back into regular shoes until October.  Let me tell you, though, flip-flops do NOT keep your toes warm at all. Remember when we used to call them thongs? Not anymore. Great way to scandalize a sixth-grader, though!

*I spent about 90 minutes yesterday pulling out dandelions in the backyard. I cannot bring myself to put down chemical weedkillers, so I pull the worst of them by hand, and mow the small ones down (well, actually, 17-year-old-Boy mows them down). Husband came home and looked askance at me, asking if I was being 'conservative' because of my back. Of course, honey, I lied right to his face, and went back to crawling around on the lawn. Surprisingly, this is the second consecutive day with minimal back pain. Maybe those injections are really working.

*The Tigers? Are in first place in their division right now. And they beat the Yankees last night. I need to savor this while I can, but their pitching improves daily. The Red Wings start their next series Friday against the Anaheim Mighty Ducks. The Captain's Canucks will face LiteralDan's Blackhawks. I really hate playing west coast teams. The time difference means some games don't start until it's ten p.m. here. I am way too old for that.

*19-year-old-Girl just came in and whined about her hair growing too slowly. Then she asked me when my breasts got small. I had to prove they were still bodacious. She's got me into Doctor Who, which I have seen the first four episodes (of the new incarnation, anyway). Seriously goofy fun. But she's cheesed that I'll only watch on weekends. Sorry, girlie, there's a baseball game on. I have to keep an eye ear on my Tigers.

I really hate the word 'boobs.' Hate. Really. Ick. That sounds like a great way to end this...

In the Dark

It's Dark 'Thirty a.m., and I am up to take a friend to the airport. He works on secret military stuff, which I can't tell you about because he can't tell ME about it. But he's a good guy, and I hate to see him pay twelve dollars per day to leave his Acura in a place of questionable security for multiple weeks at a time.

The thing is, though I am up at a ridiculous hour of the morning, I realized after the first snooze alarm, that Husband was not in bed. Had, in fact, not YET been in bed, and had been up all night dealing with a server issue at one of the offices of the law firm for which he toils. He will tell you that he is handsomely compensated for this silliness. I can't help but think that there isn't that much money on the planet.

Recently, it hasn't happened much, but last year at this time, he was dealing with a virus outbreak that took months to resolve. Amazingly, he maintains his equilibrium throughout these episodes, at least outwardly, something I would never be able to do under such circumstances.

Honey? Snookums? If you could share some of that composure....nah, I guess you need all you can get just to deal with ME.

What Every Parent Hopes to See Written on Her Daughter

She got it at Cedar Point, so she claims.