Unmitigated

RTT: Time Warp Edition

Busy, busy, busy around here. Monday has apparently transported all the way to Tuesday. Which means I am writing this on Monday, so the time references are weird. Please ignore.

Keely is the host of Random Tuesdays. I think. It's been a while since I did one of these.

Buddy is off to New York to do some work on something technical there. I don't like the New York people he works with. They are ridiculously rude. It doesn't usually bother Buddy at all, but my Mama Bear hackles go up when I hear what he puts up with from them. I couldn't do it.

Friday and Saturday I was in Grand Rapids, MI for the Michigan Science Teachers Association annual conference. I went to some sessions, some of which were fascinating, all of which I found useful. My friend, Susan, who had done some work consulting for us at The Henry Ford last summer, was presented with an award, and she invited me to be her "date" for the awards luncheon. It was really inspiring to be with these teachers and hear their stories, and their dedication to teaching and learning.

Almost made me want to go back to the classroom. But not really.

While I was gone, Buddy went to see Black Swan, and informed me I would NOT have liked it. I have no trouble believing that at all. It brought his total of Best Picture viewings to 9 out of 10. We both agreed that we didn't want to see 127 Hours. I nearly fainted last night when I saw a tiny clip of James Franco in the movie, the scene where he falls and gets pinned by his arm. I had to put my head between my knees to keep from being sick.

Does anyone else think James Franco looked like he had sparked one up before the show last night? I was very happy for Melissa Leo, whom I have loved since her days on Homicide, and I also correctly predicted Best Picture, Best Actor in a Lead Role, and Best Actor in a Supporting Role. Big surprise of the night was Randy Newman's win, which was delightful, as we are big fans, but...it's not his best song. Neither was the other one he won for, from Monsters, Inc. The songs from Toy Story, and When She Loved Me from Toy Story 2 were both better, and his BEST film song, That'll Do, from Babe: Pig in the City, should have won, but didn't. It was nice to see him beat Alan Menken, though. And I liked the song from 127 Hours, though I won't see the film!

Hey, guess what? I need another root canal! How exciting is that?

Somebody, please shoot me now. I used the very long Oscar broadcast last night to complete our state and federal taxes. At least the refund we are getting from the IRS will cover the cost of it. And several other things, including our trip to Florida in 25 days! SO excited about that. I really need some sunshine.

Ed: Although I am employed by The Henry Ford, this post, in now way, reflects the opinions of The Henry Ford.

Be Heard: You Never Know Who Might Be Listening

When I taught, it was common to hear kids say, "That's so gay!" when what they really meant was stupid or gross, or awful in some other way. I made it clear, in my classroom, that this was not ever acceptable. Never.

What do you do to stop the H8? Share!

Updated: Paul Simon or Bruce Springsteen?

" When I think back on all the crap I learned in high school,
it's a wonder I can think at all..."

Paul Simon, Kodachrome

"...we learned more from a three minute record, baby,
than we ever learned in school..."

Bruce Springsteen, No Surrender

Yesterday I reminisced about elementary "education." Today, I promised to go back to high school. For me, high school was 9th, 10th, and 12th grades. I had the opportunity to graduate after three years instead of four, and having accidentally picked up some wisdom somewhere down the line, I leapt at the chance.

9th grade - I learned that my biology teacher wisely changed his name in the classroom from Mr. Ball to Mr. Osprey. I learned why they called Sister Cecelia, the "White Tornado." And I learned that the popular kids were still pretty much in charge, but that it was possible to find your group.

10th grade - I learned that, even though I had avoided Father Van by erasing the "Honors" after the English course my freshman teacher had insisted I sign up for, I could manage to find the meanest woman on the planet in a regular English class. I wanted to introduce her to my fifth grade nun, just to see the cage match.

12th grade - I learned that the nerdy types were my peeps. I learned how to speak competitively, and I met my future husband.

So, I guess high school provided at least one redeeming experience, none of it related to the curriculum.

Can you imagine how hard it was, when I taught, to answer the question, "Why do we need to know this?" Nine times out of ten, the true answer was, "You don't."

Maybe we should start asking the kids, "What do you think you'll NEED to know?" And go from there.

Diatribe over. For now.

Ed. Reading back over the 9th grade text, I recalled that Sister Cecelia was not the White Tornado. Actually, I don't think I ever knew a Sister Cecelia. I can't recall her actual name, except that it included Lillian, which is my middle name. You'd think that would make it easier. Apparently, my brain is simply making things up now. All of this may be a lie.

Spin Cycle: Education

Fasten your seatbelts.

And blame Sprite's Keeper. She's the one who chose education as a Spin Cycle topic.

By way of full disclosure, let me say that I am a certified teacher in the state of Michigan. I have an elementary certificate, which means I can teach K-8 self contained (which means in a place set up as an elementary school, where the kids spend 70% of their day in a homeroom), and have endorsements in math and science (meaning I am qualified to teach both of these at the middle school level).

I completed my teaching degree and certification in 2002, at the age of 39. My kids were already in school. As a matter of fact, when I taught in a fifth grade classroom as a student teacher, my son was in fifth grade in our home district. When I started teaching sixth grade as a new hire, my son was entering sixth grade.

All of this is to say that I have seen teaching from several angles, as a student, successful and not-so-successful; as a parent (this was definitely my worst role in the teaching tripod. I was awful as the parent of school-age kids - a whole post on its own); and as the classroom leader (conversely, this was my best role).

SO,I feel quite qualified to say that most of what we teach kids in American schools is an utter waste of time. Once we get past teaching kids to read and do basic math, we spend the rest of 13 years of mandatory education teaching kids how to be really good at Trivial Pursuit.

Here is a list of what I remember from K-8:

Kindergarten - I sat at the blue table, my friend Amy sat at the red table. I interrupted. A lot. Robert Sullivan ate glue.

1st grade - I learned that if you bring a bag of six Oreo cookies to school for lunch (and nothing else), Sister Coralita will yell at you. And phonics. We read charts of word families At Bat, Cat, Fat, Hat, etc.

2nd grade - Mrs. Krueger read Pippi Longstocking out loud to us, and told us that it was inappropriate to use "Xmas" instead of "Christmas".

3rd grade - I was smart enough to be in the split class, meaning Mrs. Krueger (again) could leave the third graders on their own, while she worked with the second graders. It was in this grade that I really learned how to blow off any kind of assignment, and still do just fine on the tests.

4th grade - I learned that Sister Genesia would let us watch the playoffs if we "worked" quietly. I wrote a poem that year, and was accused of having copied it from a book. The social studies nun taught us that there were three 'races' of people called caucasoid, negroid, and mongoloid. Seriously.

5th grade - I learned that it was possible to be so cold from playing in the parking lot in the winter that you could come inside, and during afternoon prayers, wet yourself without even realizing it was happening. I also learned that there are ways to humiliate students even beyond the stigma of having wet oneself in the classroom at the age of ten. I spent 3 and a half more years in this school, with this group of kids. Imagine what fun that was.

6th grade - academically, don't remember a thing. I remember Sister Claudine. My dad was impressed with her because she spoke four languages, and had escaped from Poland during World War II.

7th grade - Mrs. Allen, the science teacher, taught us the names of all the bones in the body. I still remember those. And it comes in very handy during everyday life.

8th grade - I learned that there was a person who hated the "popular kids" more than I did - Ms. Makurat (rhymes with packrat), a former nun. She made Laura O'Hagan stand up in front of the class (someone else's class, BTW, not hers) while she yelled at her for being a whore. Imagine that happening now.

Tomorrow, I tackle high school. Don't worry. It won't take long.

Need Your Votes!

My new boss has supervised a team of students from the Henry Ford Academy high school, the magnet school that is built into the museum grounds. They have produced a really stunning, eco-friendly, tech-integrated dashboard design for a national contest called DASH+.

The three designs that were submitted are being voted on until Monday at the end of the day.

I need all my bloggy friends to leap in and VOTE! At this link, their design is on the left. You can vote once per day until tomorrow! Feel free to pass it along, too!